The best kind of magic

The holidays are over and I'm back at school. Apparently, I define "holidays" as December through my birthday, and the subsequent two weeks.

I'm posted up in my apartment editing my thesis proposal over and over, already dreading PATH exams that will take place in exactly sixteen days. If I were Catholic, I'd be doing the sign of the cross a lot these days.

Needless to say, my brain is in academic mode. Especially since it can no longer be in holiday mode. Which is what we're really here to talk about anyway.

The holidays.

Early in December I saw an episode of Parenthood where the mother is trying to keep her kid from finding out Santa isn't real. She said she doesn't want to tell the kid so that the kid can have a few more years of "Christmas magic."

So I got offended.

Here is what I remember about uncovering Santa's dirty little secret: One day I asked my best friend how Santa gets to all the houses in one night and she responded, "Timezones." Instead of saying that Santa still couldn't get to every kids house, even with a handicap, I just shrugged it off. And that's when I kinda figured it was just something your parents tell you for fun.

Kinda like "Never eat anything blue" (um...M&Ms? Hullo?) or "The neighbors don't want to see your [super chic] Dalmatian underwear."

I would hardly say the magic of Christmas was swiped from my fat little fists over a timezone debate.

And, as a matter of fact, the magic of Christmas just amplifies every year.

Let's be honest, I wrote a whole blog about why Jesus doesn't matter, so I don't exactly correlate him with Christmas. Plus, there's biblical evidence he was born in pretty much any season but winter, so the whole "reason for the season" thing is a bit off. (Side note: isn't being born pretty petty compared to, oh, I don't know, raising from the dead? Christians should be focusing way more on Easter than Christmas anyway, am I right? They could have at least picked something more logical to represent it than a bunny that delivers eggs filled with candy. Talk about identity crisis. No wonder kids figure these things out.)

But I digress.

Point being, the Christmas season, and consequentially Christmas magic, has little to do with my idea of Christmas. It's about giving - I get more and more excited to give my sisters gifts as I grow up. It's about time together, laughing like we're kids instead of adult professionals, and pretending we can do advanced yoga moves and then proving it in front of the TV while mom yells "You're gonna hurt yourself!" It's about recharging from the energy you only have when you're together, and celebrating each other's triumphs and opportunities (a new puppy! a job search!). And it's about knowing the people around you are there during all the times. Whatever adjective used for those times, the people that create that Christmas magic are there for them.

This Christmas was unusual for our family. We had to memorialize the passing of one of our own just days before the holiday. But shortly after, my mom told me that when she stood up to give the eulogy, she stood up with the power of eight behind her. She was not alone.

And that, my friends, is Christmas magic.

Put Simply.

In honor of Dan Cathy's... let's say "strong"...statements, this is what I have to say to people against gay marriage:

Catholic Badasses

This is an ode to nuns.

Nuns have been all over the news lately. Mostly as the target of Vatican condemnation. Aside from the sister that wrote "Just Love," the Vatican has also been upset recently that nuns aren't focusing on fighting birth control and homosexuality.

So here's why I love nuns.

Nuns give up everything to be nuns. Priests and other clergymen get to keep all their things and they get power and an audience as well. It seems that the higher up you get, the more you get. Which is similar to any business, in their defense. But nuns decide that they're going to give up all their worldly possessions to live how they think God/Jesus wants them to. Or whatever their reasoning is. But they don't want anything back for it. They don't get power, they don't get paid, and for the most part they don't get any recognition. They just do what they do cause they think it's the right thing. And that is badass.

Nuns do good things. Now, for the most part, I don't really know all that much about nuns. But it seems that their response to the Vatican saying they don't focus on birth control and homosexuality enough is, "Sorry, Popey-pope, too busy takin' care of the sick and needy. We'll let ya know when they're all taken care of and then we'll focus on the more frivolous things." Or so I imagine. Which, at least in my imagination, is badass.

Nuns cover their bodies. I don't really care how nuns choose to dress, but after seeing all the Muslim women in Morocco covering their bodies and hearing their reasons why, I have a new respect for people that choose to save their physical features for God/their husband. If only America could make the connection that neither nuns nor (Moroccan) Muslim women are forced to veil themselves. That would be badass.

So there you have it - my ode to nuns. I don't particularly care for the Catholic church or it's hier(patri)archy, but as far as nuns are concerned, they are the cream of the crap to me.

A rabbi and a priest...

Y'all.

I love religious jokes.

I love funny ones, I love offensive ones, I love ones that I would never repeat.

I may be in grad school for journalism, but I will always have a soft spot in my heart for my religion major. And when I share religious jokes for people, sometimes they just don't get it.

For example, Jason knows nothing about religion. Today he's been working with his project group all day, who just happens to be a very diverse cluster of people. Georgia Tech in general is known for its overwhelming population of Asians and Indians. So when I saw this picture, I had to send it to Jason.

Of course, it's hilarious. Racist? Maybe. But hilarious nonetheless. So then Jason texts me about it, and this is the ensuing conversation:

And of course, I'm laughing myself to tears cause I think I'm so funny. But Jason has no clue what on earth his crazy female is rambling on about. This is a frequent occasion.

And so, because I'm pretty sure some of my blog readers are more in tune with religion, I am going to share some of my favorites in terms of religious humor on here. Hopefully the response will be better than Jason's.

Why Jesus Doesn't Matter

Don't get too offended yet, hear me out.

Sometimes I'll have religious discussions with people, and hearing me talk about God leads people to ask why, then, I don't consider myself Christian.

Now, to be Christian, you must believe in the holiness of Christ, yes? Seems essential. And I just don't. So here's why.

I don't really "buy" the Bible. There are a lot of things I disagree with, there are a decent amount of ridiculous rules, and it just doesn't do much for me. So that's the bottom line. I just don't believe it. But let's pretend.

Say Jesus was, indeed, everything the Bible says he was. We'll go for fully divine and fully human (shout out to the Nicene Creed for that one...indecision at its finest..."we choose...BOTH!"). So say he died for the sins of humanity, for atonement. He was miraculously conceived, he performed miracles, etc.

It seems to me that Jesus was meant to do what God willed for him to do. Now I know there's the whole "he had freewill" argument, but how many times does God impregnate a woman and then the son doesn't obey his father(God)?

1- Totally against the Commandments, I'm assuming really against the commandments if your dad wrote them.

And 2-Never. According to Christianity, he's one for one.

So, in my mind, Jesus was being puppetted by God. Whatever Jesus did, he was either willed to do by God, or he had specific instructions from him. I frequently feel like decisions would be easier if I had specific instructions from God on what's right.

Also, I'm pretty sure that if I was told that my death would lead to salvation for every person to live after me, I would die too. Soldiers die every day. People jump in front of busses for others. And that's just for one person, community or country. Apparently, Jesus died for everyone. Ever. I get that it was still selfless, but I don't think it'd be a tough sell to most people.

In terms of theological study, many people find comfort in Jesus because he offers divinity in human form. People can relate to him and feel like he is a compassionate listener who provides a direct line (of prayer, communication) to God. What is a more direct line of communication to God, however, is actually communicating with God. I don't see any reason to have a liaison in my relationship with God, whether it's a priest or a prophet or an alleged son.

People delight in personal relationships with Jesus, but if Jesus is the son of God, and God is the almighty and all-knowing...why not cultivate that personal relationship with God directly?

So the main point is...I don't believe the stories of the Bible are hard fact. I think they're stories to make points. I think Jesus is a metaphor for God's love for us and desire to have a relationship with us. But if Jesus was real and did all the things the Bible outlines, it all still points back to God. Everything looks back to God, so whether it was truth or metaphor, I don't see how the importance of Jesus matches up to, much less supersedes, the importance of God.

And that is why, at least to me, Jesus doesn't matter.

In honor of 235 years of your citizens bickering

Per usual, I'm reading the CNN Belief Blog on my lunch break.
Per usual, I'm seeking out the posts about church & state.

And I found this gem.

In honor of Independence Day, it's a post called "Why the U.S. is not a Christian Nation." And it's fascinating.

If you don't feel like reading through the whole thing, here are some quick facts that interested me:
- Thomas Jefferson was the one that coined the term "separation of church and state", but it wasn't part of the Declaration of Independence, his most notable work. It was in a letter to a Baptist church in Connecticut.
- The author says that most of the founding fathers were Protestant (I was taught in my religion classes that they were mostly deist).
- The Constitution states, "No religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States." Then at the end of the Constitution is a "Year of the Lord" reference. (Hey, they tried.)
- One of America's earliest foreign treaties, signed under John Adams, says, "As the government of the United States of America is not in any sense founded on the Christian Religion, -- as it has in itself no character of enmity against the laws, religion or tranquility of Musselmen (Muslims) ..."
- "In God We Trust" was first stamped on American currency after the Civil War, and didn't become the national motto until 1956.
- "Under God" was added into the Pledge of Allegiance 60 years after it was written (for a children's magazine) in 1954.

And the most hilarious:
- The "Ten Commandments" statues in various places around America were mostly established as a publicity stunt for the 1956 movie "The Ten Commandments."

I blame the 50's.

Now I'm not saying that we need to immediately remove all evidence that anyone in America ever believed in God, I'm just saying that maybe we shouldn't get our panties in such a bundle when someone threatens to. The symbols of "America's faith" are not the cornerstone of our country.

All this being said, the money doesn't say "In the Christian God We Trust" and in the Pledge it doesn't say, "one nation, under Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior." The argument should be whether we're a country of theism or not.

Either way, Happy birthday, America! And thanks for the ability to criticize you and blog about you as much as I want. You're still my favorite.

Bloggin' and Believin'

I've found a gem. Slash a hope for my future career as a religion/journalism major.

The CNN Belief Blog has a little bit of everything. Something that it has a LOT of, however, is loud-mouthed atheists that abuse the "comment" capability.

That being said, I just found this paragraph in one of the articles:

"The Protestant Reformation was in part about getting away from the authority of priests and popes. Why approach God indirectly when you can do so directly, Protestants asked. Why not read the Bible for yourself?

Unfortunately, there isn't much evidence that many American Protestants today are reading scripture with frequency or care. On a battery of 12 questions about Christianity and the Bible, American Protestants got 6.5 questions right on average, for a score of 54%. Many must rely on pastors like Long to tell them what to do and think."

Yikes.

That being said, I can't say I'm surprised. I think there is a very good point, that I have been known to argue myself, that people shouldn't rely solely on pastoral direction for spiritual guidance.

The article is about Eddie Long, pastor of a Baptist megachurch that got caught in a scandal. Go figure. We've seen this a time or two before, most notably with Catholic priests. But people are tired of the "Catholic priest caught in scandal with little boy" drama, namely Catholics. What I like about the article is that it mentions other religions and denominations that have been caught in scandals too, including Buddhists. We knew they were out there.

Anyways, if you have a lull at work and find all this interesting, take a look around the blog. They have belief and faith-based angles on current events as well as personal testimonies and experiences.

PS- World is ending on OCTOBER 21 now. Pastor Camping sends his apologies for the mix-up. Oopsies!

I like this in so many ways.

Psych

Welp, guess the rapture didn't happen. Not because I'm still here, but because my grandmother's still here. And if she didn't make it, the rest of us are doomed.

Though it seems contradictory, I love my home church. A large part of why, is because of our pastor, Dee Shelnutt. Yesterday he addressed briefly how dumb predicting the rapture makes Christians look, and how the word "rapture" is no where in the scripture. He then urged the congregation to be more Bible literate.

We're in love.

One of the associate pastors stood up to give the "celebrations and concerns" and, with a straight face, said to us, "I'm going to be honest, I'm not completely prepared because I didn't expect to still be here today. However, I will continue from the detailed notes that I had left for Dee."

The choir loft was in tears, laughing so hard.

Another good line from all the rapture jokes: "So what if the rapture didn't happen? It's not the end of the world."

Farewell, sinners

In the event that the rapture actually happens tomorrow, I would like to go on the record saying that I did, indeed, graduate from college.

Christian Carrie

On a lighter and opposite note, the church has brought some good things with it, too. It brings people peace, a sense of community, and has helped people all over the world through missions.

It comes with holidays that bring the family together:








It has also brought music and chilling moments like this:

Consecration and condemnation

This morning I took the test of all tests in my Modern Christian Theology class.

Tuesday I left the same class furious.

As a disclaimer, I understand that every religion, ethnic group and country has its history. This class just happens to be about Christian history.

I've been known to interpret the Bible differently than other people, but to me it seems like Christ's idea for what is now Christianity has not exactly come to fruition.

Not only did the early church add in things like the papacy (based on Peter?), they then held the First Vatican Council and declared him infallible. But that's another story for another day.

If there is one thing that I've learned in this class, it's that religion in fact falls into a category along side ethnic groups and nations. There are hierarchies, there are wars, and there are way too many cases of mistreating their own.

In terms of explaining wars, the term "crusades" should suffice.

The hierarchies of the church are prevalent but not always scripturally based. I can perhaps credit my Protestant upbringing with my idea that a religion should be based on the scripture and words of the holy figure. In realizing that other sects and religions focus more strongly on tradition, the idea of a hierarchy is more accepted. So for the most part we'll leave the hierarchy alone. (I never did understand why another man would need to be the liaison between God and me though.)

So now we've come to mistreating their own.

Again, it is my belief that we all have the same God. So the Turks taking over Constantinople and forcing Islam is almost as baffling to me as Christians killing each other.

Almost.

Let's explore.

-In the 16th century Michael Servetus thought that maybe Catholics shouldn't emphasize the trinity when trying to convert people because it didn't make sense to Jews and Muslims. So he was burned at the stake.
- Henry VIII wanted to get divorced from his barren wife so that he could have an heir with another woman so he started the Anglican church. Then he killed a bunch of Catholics and Lutherans.
- Thomas Cranmer was forced to denounce Protestantism under torture from Queen Mary and then later was executed anyway.
- In 1864 Pope Pius IX issued the Syllabus of Errors that listed 80 things that non-Catholics believed. All of which were condemned by the Catholic church.
- During the French Revolution, anyone who thought that the pope didn't have absolute authority in every nation was killed, including Gallicans, Febronians, and Josephists.
- Even as recent as 1907, Pope Pius X issued lamentabili, a doctrine listing 67 modernist propositions that were condemned.
- In Russian Orthodoxy, the people that didn't agree with reforms, Old Believers or Slavophiles, were then condemned and all killed. Most of them didn't want to be killed though so they committed suicide by lighting themselves on fire.

The list goes on forever. Add in the crusades and the inquisitions and you have a real good time.

Point being, the church has a dirty history.

I can't help but think that if everyone that associated with any church learned this history, they would question their allegiance.

So this is the question: Does declaring loyalty to a denomination or Christianity in general require the acceptance or condonation of its past?

I hope not. And I think not.

The majority of the Christians I know, and dare I say Christians in the world, do not understand the extent that the early church went to in order to "protect" its beliefs and truths. When singing "Jesus Loves Me" and telling stories of the good Samaritan, somehow the bloody past of the religion gets left out.

To me, not knowing about the history does not make them less Christian. I think it's important to question and understand what you are in fact insinuating by stating, "I am a Baptist/Unitarian/Catholic, etc." I also think that people who really question their beliefs and go on a spiritual journey to find the best religion, pick the teachings that speak to them and bring them peace.

The idea of God in a man brings comfort to people, and Jesus brought a lot of hope and peace with him, regardless of his actual divinity. I think it's absolutely acceptable to take that peace and hope for what it is, and leave the church's actions in the past.

I do not think, however, that is is acceptable to take the path of least resistance and blindly choose whatever denomination/religion was chosen for you by your family or society. Discover what's best for you on your own. And if at the end of the day what really does it for you happens to be the same thing that does it for your family, too— then more power to you.

That being said, I think Christians, and people in general, can learn a lesson from the abundant condemnation done by the church already, and think twice before judging others. Originally the papacy may have been thought of as heresy and here the Catholics are with Pope Benedict XVI, number 265.

Society changes. And the church changes with it. Second Vatican Council, anyone?

The basics of Christianity are to love God and love one another. I don't exactly know where "kill those who disagree with you on any issue" is in the Bible, but I haven't quite read it all.

Organized religion is what you make it. As is any form of spirituality. But in labeling yourself as a specific religion or denomination, history comes with it. I hope the free-thinking society we live in today feels welcome to doubt and question the intentions and corruption of any denomination.

But if that denomination is what floats your boat and brings you peace, then don't hold back from pursuing it. Just be aware of the past.

Hell or Higher Power

My roommate Meagan doesn't think I'm going to hell.

Now, this may seem like a normal thing for friends to think about each other, but Meagan was born, raised and schooled pretty conservatively Christian.

As I've learned and grown in my beliefs, it's very clear that I don't recognize with any one organized religion. One of my favorite quotes of all time is C.K. Chesterton: "Let your religion be less of a theory and more of a love affair." And that's what it is to me.

Point being, a large majority of my friends are strong Christians, many of whom even went to Christian high schools. And I love to discuss religion with them, hence my major. I'll talk to anyone about it.

But I learned early on that not everyone is receptive to non-traditional beliefs. I've been called a heathen, told I'm going to hell, asked if I was kidding when I said I wasn't Christian, and even received a 12-page letter from a good friend of mine explaining why God disapproves of my beliefs and choices.

Now for the SparkNotes version, I believe in God. God and I hang out. We're besties. I think pretty much everything can be contributed to God so the details don't really concern me.

That being said, I talk to my roommates and some friends about God openly, and it's evident to them that God and I have a relationship.

Meagan and I had a long talk the other day. After being taught her whole life that Jesus is the only way to heaven, she's confused as to what's going to happen to me. I've never been too concerned about it, I'll trust that God knows what he's doing.

Plus, there's no point worrying about the afterlife cause we're not going to know if we're right til we die. And then we're dead. Or in hell. Or heaven. Or purgatory. Or swimming around in a giant midnight truffle blizzard from DQ.

Anyways, Meagan (and a lot of my friends) aren't used to questioning the beliefs they grew up with.

If there is one thing that I have constantly been taught and put into practice, it's to question. Question everything. My parents always taught me that sometimes the teacher ISN'T right. And that no one actually knows all the answers. Yes, even them. This was never an excuse to be rude to anyone, but I was always pushed to question.

In my mind, there is nothing more important to question than religion. It is the core of billions of people, shapes cultures and is used as a scapegoat for war. It is a huge part of the reason homosexuality has such a stigma, and it causes unnecessary rifts between people that could otherwise learn from each other.

I've learned that many people don't understand the texts they're taught to live by and that many people haven't actually studied any other religion but their own.

Now, this isn't meant to be a rap on religion in general. If someone has studied and thought deeply about everything they've been taught, and at the end of the day honestly believes in the truth of it, then more power to them. I'm not saying I'm right and I'm not saying anyone else is wrong. Because, quite frankly, how are we gonna prove it?

All I know, is I believe what I believe because I've questioned every aspect of it, and what I'm left with is what I can't shake. Things that I haven't lost faith in after four years of religion classes.

I believe my God wants me to question everything. He wants me to get angry, ask why, feel lost, and at the end of the day, come back to him and say, "Yea, you were right."

Now I'm in no way an expert on anything religion. Not sure anyone really is. But if I have one piece of advice that I can offer, it's to question. If anything, it'll make you stronger in the things you really believe, and I promise you won't be left empty handed.

A Christmas Eve Story

Christmas morning used to be my favorite. Everything leading up to it was training for the big day. I could barely fall asleep at night due to the reindeer hooves on the roof (Bob feet in the attic) and I would wake up my sisters as early as I was allowed in the morning. We would wait upstairs or on the stairs while Mom and Bob made coffee. When we got the word, we would scramble down the stairs and one of us would play "elf" by passing out rounds of presents, one per person per round. Presents are always opened youngest to oldest.

Well as it appears, I'm getting older. In the past seven or eight years things have changed and today I made the final decision that Christmas Eve has now surpassed Christmas morning.

In general, we have the same routine.

The night of the 23rd we roll the dough for sticky buns. At about 9 am we start delivering the wonderful breakfast platters to about 10 to 12 close family friends. Some people have been getting them since we moved to Alpharetta in 1995, but my family has been doing this for years before that.

In the afternoon we go to church. We sing the same songs, listen to the same soloist, and delight in the same candlelight singing of Silent Night.

After church we head to the Carters, possibly our closest family friends, house. There between four and eight families meet every year to catch up and enjoy each others company. Bunny Boy (A Christmas Story) is always running it's 24 hour marathon which is required to be on in the background.

It's not so much what has changed in the past few years, it's how I look at things.

First and foremost, I like my sleep. So waking up in the wee hours of the morning is no longer an option. I also know what most of my gifts are, and while that means they're things I really want/need, the element of surprise is...not so much.

This morning, while delivering sticky buns, I got to talk to some great people. The Lochers, whom I don't see very often, got to meet Grady and we visited for a long time. I also went to drop some off at Haley Nelson's house, which somehow I didn't leave for over an hour and a half. This morning's fellowship was the first thing that reminded me how much I love Christmas Eve.

Tonight at the Carters was happy hour. We went our separate ways for dinner but happy hour was together.

And it's safe to say it was a success.

It was hard to determine what was my favorite part but I've mapped out some of the best:

- Bob brought a mini keg.

- Miss James (Grandma) was drinking wine, much to the dismay of her daughter. And girlfrand DRANK that wine.

- The two 20-year-olds drank beer in front of their parents- Kevin to looks of apathy from the parents, Ben nervously darting his eyes towards his mother, waiting for a lecture or ID check.

- Kevin taught Miss James how to "pound it," complete with explosion.

- Aunt Nancy entered the room announcing, "HO HO HO...the hoe is HERE!!!" After reintroducing herself to Kevin she realized he's the same boy she's seen for at least 10 years of Christmas Eve's and decided he'd grown up well. She then made a motion to take him into the other room with her.

I mean honestly...I can't pick just ONE favorite.

All that being said, it's wonderful that I get to spend the holidays with such wonderful people. I would take a Christmas Eve over a Christmas morning any day.

Merry Christmas everyone!

UGAmateurs

On Monday the UGAtheists held "Stone a Heathen Day" at our public forum in the middle of campus, Tate Plaza. They put up posters with quotes from the Bible about when you should stone someone, had a boy stand in the middle of Tate Plaza holding a sign that said "Heathen! (Me)" with an arrow pointing to himself, and encouraged students passing through the plaza to throw "stones" (water balloons) at the heathen.



I'm not totally sure how I feel about this yet. There are tons of people that like to think of themselves as open to new cultures and ideas; who sympathetically act interested in the culture of a Buddhist classmate or pretend they aren't put off by a stranger's turban. Yet it is almost unspeakable in this Bible belt of ours to identify as an atheist.

Randall Bourquin, president of the UGAtheists, is extremely involved on campus. He was an orientation leader (an incredible honor), is in a fraternity and is known across campus. When I showed people that video I couldn't help but feel their attitudes change towards him. He states in this interview that it isn't easy being an atheist in a community such as UGA. And I'm sure it isn't. People's reactions when you simply say you aren't a Christian mix between turnt-up noses and pity that the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ hasn't "saved" you yet. Oh, but he will.

So I think we should face atheism with open minds and consider it just another religion. Or...antireligion. In my mind, I'm not going to discriminate against any other theological beliefs because there is absolutely no way to prove it. If there were, we'd all be on the same page. We won't know until we're dead and then what? We're dead. So let's treat eachother with a little respect.

That being said. I think the UGAtheists pretty much just made themselves look foolish. They weren't expressing their beliefs, they were instead putting down other religions' beliefs. They aimed towards Christianity but the quotes they used about stoning came from the Old Testament, hence Judaism. They obviously did their research. Plus, it's just an international rule that Leviticus is a bunch of bologna.

If the UGAtheists were trying to prove a point that they should be excepted as having just another system beliefs, they approached it the wrong way. Putting down Islam doesn't prove a point for Christianity, just as putting down Christianity/Judaism doesn't prove that we should all be atheists. I think it's safe to say that all religions have completely bewildering parts about them. Including atheism. They could have built themselves up by having pamphlets and a table describing their beliefs but instead they made a giant step backward and have probably lost any hope of being accepted at this Bible belt university.

Hike it up a little more, darling

Jessica Simpson's new show, "The Price of Beauty" has me mesmerized. I so wish that was my job.

This past week she spent time in Marrakech, Morocco- my hometown for a month. I was interested to see what she would say about the town and, as expected, she thought the women were oppressed and oh-so-sad because they chose to cover themselves more than Americans.

At one point, as she sat in her little hoochie shorts, one of the Moroccan women said that she probably could have covered more of her leg.

You'd think with all those producers and such she could have been filled in on the modesty of the country. Yes, they are modest. No, they are not all oppressed and helpless. In fact, they choose their level of modesty throughout their lives.

So anyways, I happen to be writing a paper for international communications on Moroccan dress and actually came up with a good paragraph pertaining to this situation.

"The argument has been made that “If we have to dress like them when we’re in their country (conservatively), then why shouldn’t they have to dress like us in our country?” The key is modesty. Your mother never told you that you weren’t going to school if you didn’t put a shorter skirt on, and your father never told you that your prom dress could use a little more cleavage. If someone came into America from a nudist colony and expected to parade around in their natural state, they would simply get arrested. And in that case, “they” do have to dress like us in our country. Government bans on the Amish head coverings “kapps” has never been an issue and asking Jews to remove their yarmulkes on the Sabbath is unheard of. That is because these days people aren’t afraid of the Amish and they aren’t afraid of Jews. Asking a woman to remove her hijab has nothing to do with wanting to see her hair and has everything to do with stripping her of her culture and identity."

So stick that in your back pocket.

Dressed to impress

I'm ready to start fighting.

So I've found events to go to in order to start my journey as a gay rights activist. Naturally, I'll have to be dressed for the occasion. So I found two shirts that I think have wonderful and profound messages. I shared these ideas with homeboy and he was not impressed.

I'm here to make my case.

The first shirt says:

"If the fetus you save is gay, will you still fight for its rights?"

To begin, this is not a stab at all you anti-choice-ers out there. For me, this is a stab at the Republican party.

Now before we get all political, let me say that I am not the flaming liberal that you may make me out to be. Ask me about affirmative action or finances sometime if you need me to prove it.

I am going to boldly state that I think 98% of Americans do not fit completely into a political party. I understand that our bipartisanship is a big part of what makes up America, but the Republican party makes no sense to me.

I'm a firm believer that the only reason abortion is controversial at all is due to the question of when life starts. Is it when the Phelps sperm meets the egg? Or when the kid can survive on its own? Or when it's full term and pops out? Whatever you may believe, that is the difference between opposing sides.

What I'm saying is that we need a party that fights for rights. In some sense, you could say democrats fight for the right to choose and the right to have a gay marriage. The way I see it, republicans say the fetus should have all the rights a full grown person has, but that a gay person's rights should be limited.

Point being: if you're going to fight for rights, fight for EQUAL rights. No picking and choosing, por favor.

The second shirt I smirked at:

"Gay is the new black."

This naturally had me immediately thinking of the Legally Blonde quote, "Whoever said orange was the new pink was seriously disturbed." It first has you thinking of classic little black dresses and black closed-toe shoes. The message might be read as "gay" being the new cool thing to do.

Good luck with that. I once had a super artsy, transcendental friend of mine tell me he tried to be gay and just couldn't do it. So yea, it doesn't work that way.

The way I like to read it is like this: gay people are just the group that us white, middle-upper class people feel like oppressing these days. Just the flavor of the half-century you might say.

White men love this stuff. They oppress people for their religion, if they're Native American, if they're women, if they're black, and now if they're gay. So, in a better sense, "gay" is the new "them."

Think about it. Can you choose to be gay or black? Negative, ghost rider. Are you any less human if you're gay or black? No sirree.

And yes, us white people are playing the "separate but equal" card again. We all remember how that worked out 50 years ago. "Civil union?" No thanks.

Let's talk about marriage. I've said it before and I'll say it again, marriage is not the property of the church. It is when two people sign a piece of paper. It is not about God's permission, purity, the crucifix on the wall, or the man in a robe rambling in front of a crowd. Atheists get married. Satan worshipers get married. People order mail order brides and get married for citizenship. You get my argument.

Now we look back saying, "Hey, my really awesome black friend would have had to use a different water fountain if someone hadn't stood up and made a difference way back when."

Well now's our chance. Because in 50 years I know my grandkids will look back proudly and say that their grandma fought for what was just.

Put me in, Coach, I'm ready to play.

Even this.

When I graduated high school my aunt gave me a book called "Leaves of Gold." It's a compilation of poems and quotes organized into feelings (i.e. love, tradgedy, hope). In this book I found my all-time favorite poem. It's no Shakespeare and it won't make your head spin trying to figure it out, but it's my fave. So I thought I'd share.

Even This Shall Pass Away

Once in Persia reigned a king,
Who upon his signet ring
Graved a maxim true and wise,
Which, if held before his eyes,
Gave him counsel at a glance
Fit for every change and chance.
Solemn words, and these are they,
“ Even this shall pass away.”

Trains of camels through the sand
Brought him gems from Samarcand;
Fleets of galleys through the seas
Brought him pearls to match with these;
But he counted not his gain
Treasures of the mine or main;
“ What is wealth?” the king would say;
“Even this shall pass away.”

'Mid the revels of his court,
At the zenith of his sport,
When the palms of all his guests
Burned with clapping at his jests,
He, amid his figs and wine,
Cried, “O loving friends of mine;
Pleasures come, but not to stay,
'Even this shall pass away.”

Lady, fairest ever seen,
Was the bride he crowned his queen.
Pillowed on his marriage bed,
Softly to his soul he said:
“Though no bridegroom ever pressed
Fairer bosom to his breast,
Mortal flesh must come to clay
Even this shall pass away.”

Fighting on a furious field,
Once a javelin pierced his shield;
Soldiers, with a loud lament,
Bore him bleeding to his tent.
Groaning from his tortured side,
“ Pain is hard to bear,” he cried;
“ But with patience, day by day,
Even this shall pass away.”

Towering in the public square,
Twenty cubits in the air,
Rose his statue, carved in stone.
Then the king, disguised, unknown,
Stood before his sculptured name,
Musing meekly: “What is fame?
Fame is but a slow decay,
Even this shall pass away.”

Struck with palsy, sore and old,
Waiting at the Gates of Gold,
Said he with his dying breath,
“ Life is done, but what is Death?”
Then, in answer to the king,
Fell a sunbeam on his ring,
Showing by a heavenly ray,
“ Even this shall pass away.”

- Theodore Tilton

Abstinence Only

Hopefully you all can read this flow chart. My awesome LGBT spirituality teacher shared this with us in class the other day. It's a flow chart of when you can or cannot have sex according to medieval expectations. In case it isn't big enough, you're lead to the box reading "STOP! SIN!" is you're pregnant, unmarried, married for less than three days, or if it's Lent, Easter, Sunday, Wednesday, Friday or Saturday. Etc, etc...

LGBTerrified of Christianity

Last semester I took an awesome class called Women in Christian History and loved the professor. So I told her I'd take whatever she taught this semester. Turns out she's teaching Lesbian/Gay/Bi/Transgender (LGBT) Spirituality. We all know I'm a fan of the sexually eclectic so I was pretty pumped. Turns out, I was rightfully pumped. This class is going to be awesome. Plus, there are some very nontraditional people in the class and it's always good to be thrown out of your comfort zone.

Anyways, the point is that we have tons of online articles to read and respond to and we recently got to read one from the always sardonic news site, The Onion. Here's the article:

GAY TEEN WORRIED HE MIGHT BE CHRISTIAN

LOUISVILLE, KY—At first glance, high school senior Lucas Faber, 18, seems like any ordinary gay teen. He's a member of his school's swing choir, enjoys shopping at the mall, and has sex with other males his age. But lately, a growing worry has begun to plague this young gay man. A gnawing feeling that, deep down, he may be a fundamentalist, right-wing Christian.

"I don't know what's happening to me," Faber admitted to reporters Monday. "It's like I get these weird urges sometimes, and suddenly I'm tempted to go behind my friends' backs and attend a megachurch service, or censor books in the school library in some way. Even just the thought of organizing a CD-burning turns me on."

Added Faber, "I feel so confused."

The openly gay teen, who came out to his parents at age 14 and has had a steady boyfriend for the past seven months, said he first began to suspect he might be different last year, when he started feeling an odd stirring within himself every time he passed a church. The more conservative the church, Faber claimed, the stronger his desire was to enter it.

"It's like I don't even know who I am anymore," the frightened teenager said. "Keeping this secret obsession with radical right-wing dogma hidden away from my parents, teachers, and schoolmates is tearing me apart."

According to Faber, his first experience with evangelical Christianity was not all that different from other gays his age.

"Sure, I looked at the Book of Leviticus once or twice—everybody has," Faber said. "We all experiment a little bit with that stuff when we're growing up. But I was just a kid. I didn't think it meant anything."

Faber's instinct was to deny these early emotions. But recently, the Louisville teen admitted, the feelings have grown stronger, making him wonder more and more what life as a born-again right-wing fundamentalist would be like.

"The other week, I was this close to picketing in front of an abortion clinic," the mortified teenager said, his eyes welling up with tears. "I know it's wrong, but I wanted so badly to do it anyway. I even made one of those signs with photos of dead fetuses and hid it in my closet. I felt so ashamed, yet, at the same time, it was all strangely titillating."

Faber's parents, although concerned, said they're convinced their otherwise typical gay son is merely going through a conservative Christian phase.

"I caught him watching The 700 Club once when he thought he was alone in the house, and last week, I found some paperbacks from the Left Behind series hidden in his sock drawer," his mother, Eileen Faber, said. "I'm sure he'll grow out of it, but even if he doesn't, I will love and accept my son no matter what."

Faber's father was far less tolerant in his comments.

"No son of mine is going to try to get intelligent design into school textbooks," Geoffrey Faber said. "And I absolutely refuse to pay his tuition if he decides to go to one of those colleges like Oral Roberts University where they're just going to fill his head with a lot of crazy conservative ideas."

He added, "I just want my normal gay son back."

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/gay_teen_worried_he_might_be